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6 common questions all parents face during their second pregnancy

  • March 16, 2018
  • Pregakem
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second pregnancy

Parenting the first time around is a mixed bag of emotions, right from uncertainty to excitement and constant worry. But, by the time the second baby is on its way, most parents are a little more relaxed since they have some experience in pregnancy and childbirth now. Despite this, every parent experiences their own concerns when it comes to the second pregnancy. Things such as family balance, whether your kids will get along, whether you will be able to love both of them equally, and so on, start creeping into your mind the moment those two lines on your pregnancy test kit confirm the arrival of the second baby. In this article, we will discuss the common concerns that most new parents face when they’re expecting baby #2 and how you can deal with them. 

1. Will the family balance change a lot? 
By the time the second pregnancy has begun, your first child has grown and is well settled. You and your partner have also adjusted to the new groove of things. Many parents worry about this balance being thrown off track with another child on the way. The family balance may change, routines might get shaken up and there’ll be a clear shift in the dynamics, but that’s only natural. However, the transition is easier than you think. You already have experience with parenting. Your house is well-adjusted to nurture a child, and you and your partner know just how to work as a team. If you prepare your first child well enough, they too will prove to be immensely helpful in caring for their younger sibling. Your family may not be the same, but it’ll be much better!  

2. How will we handle the finances with a newborn?
As with every major decision, planning for a second child also requires taking finances into consideration well in advance. Having said that, unless there are some complications or medical emergencies, the expenses incurred with the coming of another baby are fewer than the first time. Think about it – you already have essentials, clothes, diapers, toys and the likes from your first child. Many schools and preschools also grant a discount if the child’s sibling is already studying there. So, you’re saving money on a lot of fronts. You may have to rejig and cut down on some usual expenses and indulgences to cover the expenses of this new member. But, if you discuss things thoroughly with your partner and strategize your finances together, you actually won’t feel a big pinch on your wallet at all. 

3. Will the first months be as hard as the first time?
Not really. The first time you had to figure everything out from scratch. The second time you are already mentally prepared for what’s to come and that itself makes it easier. You know the smaller things for which you need to prepare yourself. Most importantly, you know how to take care of and be around an infant. By the time your second baby has arrived, you will be more confident and mentally as well as physically prepared to take care of a newborn all over again. 

4. How will the mom cope with two kids in the house? And what if both kids need her at the same time? 
A big aspect of motherhood relies on natural instinct to ensure the best for her offspring. And that in itself will be a major guiding force for you. As a mom, you may not have as much free time as you once did, and your social life may wind down to zero, but parenting is a constant learning process that you’ll find extremely satisfying. A crucial aspect of this is to let go of the rules and personal pet peeves you once held very close to your heart. For instance, a house with kids in it is always going to be messy and cluttered, and that is something you will just have to accept instead of constantly running around and cleaning the mess. 

As for juggling the needs of both kids at the same time, your first child will get used to it and moreover will eventually understand that the younger one needs you more. Keeping one kid busy while you tend to the other one is a trick that comes in handy for many moms often. 

If you need help on this subject, you can refer to our post Tips to manage a toddler and a newborn at the same time. 

5. Will our kids get along?
It all depends on the ground you set their relationship on. Yes, there will be a few tantrums thrown in the beginning by the first child for want of attention. Since no two kids are the same, the difference in temperaments may also cause friction. As parents, you have to ensure that both kids spend enough time with each other, but also respect each other’s uniqueness. Create an atmosphere where the family celebrates each other’s differences, and accepts each other. When your kids grow up in such an atmosphere, their bond with each other will be healthy and strong.  

When you love and accept both your kids equally, they too look at each other in the same light and security. It’s going to be a treat for you and your partner to watch your kids grow up to be each other’s biggest supporters! 

6. Will the entire pregnancy, childbirth, and feeding, be the same as the first time?
No two pregnancies are the same. There have been many cases where the first pregnancy was easy, but the second was a bit more complicated and vice versa. The biggest benefit of a second pregnancy is that you are much more equipped mentally and physically to deal with whatever comes your way. You will be less intimidated by the changes and responsibilities. Whatever the case may be, the majority of mothers agree that the second time is easier and smoother than the first pregnancy. 

So, worry less, and concentrate on the joys that will be multiplied especially when your second child comes along. Don’t forget to make the most of this experience and have fun while at it!

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